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: Evolution Update : outdeep February 24, 2005, 10:59:43 PM Satire from www.scrappleface.com (http://www.scrappleface.com)
'No Croc Left Behind' to Help Evolutionary Failures by Scott Ott (2005-02-24) -- After the recent discovery of two ancient crocodile skulls which closely resemble modern crocodiles despite 40 million years of evolution, the National Science Foundation (NSF) today issued a grant of $56 million to fund the new 'No Croc Left Behind' (NCLB) program. The program, administered by the American Institute of Biological Science (AIBS) is designed to end the "soft bigotry of low expectations which has kept crocodiles mired in the backwaters of evolutionary progress for tens of millions of years." Genetic scientists at AIBS will attempt to "aggressively hyper-evolve" the modern crocodile to "bring it more in line with Darwinian expectations." "We're designing some random mutations to improve the crocodile's survivability," said an unnamed AIBS scientist, "Future croc features might include a retractable periscope, a gas-powered outboard motor and perhaps skin that's unfit for making shoes and purses. Of course, taxonomically, it will still be a crocodile...but we're just scientists, not miracle workers." : Re: Evolution Update : glossyibis March 03, 2005, 12:08:10 AM Dear Dave,
more evolution news please. No croc left behind, what a hoot. I knew that evolution was a croc anyway. I did think I was evolving at one time but it turned out to be a hang nail. steve harris : Re: Evolution Update : glossyibis March 17, 2005, 10:07:07 AM Proof of evolution,
Casino gambling in Missouri was approved by voters but to only be allowed on riverboats while operating in the water. Later the gambling interests got laws changed to allow gambling on a docked boat. Then they got the casinos built on dry land with a moat dug around the building to qualify it as a boat. Then they tried to get their buildings built on the flood plain within a certain distance ( I believe 1000 feet) from the river. Their rationale being that the flood plain is part of the river. So far this has been unsuccessful but they keep trying. This is proof that snakes can live in the river and adapt to dry land. It is easier to prey on the stupid and the weak that way. Darwinists can now rest their case, steve harris |