A Great Friendship

“A Great Friendship” By Roger Grant

-   A friend is someone who is special to them.
-   A friend gives more than he takes.
-   A friend loves that other person and that love is tested.
-   A friend loves when that person is unlovely.
-   A friend has a love with commitment and loves when there are reasons not to.
-   A friend is a shepherd, a companion with someone else.
-   A friend has respect for another person because that person was made by God; You respect their preferences and feelings.
-    In a friendship there is an openness and a clarity.
-    In a friendship there is a real ability to confront.
-    Friends can look one another in the eye with an open face.
-   In a friendship you have a common interest.
-    Friendships with Jesus involves obedience.
-   You can’t have a casual relationship ( friendship) with Jesus. You have to let God have His way in your life.
-   To have a friend, 1st you have to be a friend.
-    Friendship is a living thing and you have to take care of it!
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** Taken from I Samuel 20**

These are notes that I have kept from a “word” that Roger Grant gave several years back ( maybe even 10 years ago or less). Not quite sure of the date. But I have kept this set of notes because I really liked the ministry. Even then I would look at these notes and try and see if there were really friendships in this place that fit this criteria. Back then I thought to myself , Roger preaches this and yet he is not this kind of a friend himself. Yet there is supposed to be a love in that place ( lodge) that resembles and even lives in the hearts of those there. This is the type of friendships that the Lord would want to see there. Those types of friendships in 98% of those there, are not like this. Relationships there are all surface, working relationships. You do what they say, do not question them in any way, and are fully submissive to the point of being a floormat then you will thrive there!
Some of the points in this set of notes really floors me of the hypocrisy there. For example the word “love” used in light of friendships. What a crock! Love is a word that is used flippantly in the lodge. Oh yes, everybody loves everybody else there (sarcastic). That is why the moment you question something you are labeled a “rebel” . Or if you LEAVE the lodge, there is no more love, or friendship or relationship of any kind…you are an outcast, you are full of shame and of course no matter what the reason ,you are in sin. I mean there has to be sin involved , why else would you leave right? ( sarcastic) When my family left the lodge, I received cards, letters, calls, and e-mails that insisted that I was in sin and that I needed to repent. Some even listed reasons why I needed to repent. I am so glad that others know my heart and relationship with God better than God and I do.( sarcastic) If you are “in” the lodge, you are loved( flippantly), but if you leave, you cannot be loved anymore.
Another point that I would like to focus on is the word “respect”. Roger said that “a friend has respect for another person b/c that person was made by God; you respect their preferences and feelings.” What respect? When our family left the lodge we asked to be left alone. We had wanted time to think and seek God and go forward in life and apart from them.. What we got is an onslaught of nasty letters, e-mails , calls and visits. The lodge members disrespected our request and this onslaught has continued to very recently and we left over 3 years ago. ( that Article/Post will be soon to follow). Now I have to say that not all the lodge-members have harassed us. But the ones that have, have been relentless. Some of them that have called themselves my very close friends, have shown me such disrespect that I am absolutely appalled. None of the contacts have been positive, all negative. Honestly, do the present lodge members think that by showing no respect and lack of adherence to our wishes that we would ever consider to return?
Another important point that I would like to comment on, is the one that Roger Grant said, “ In a friendship there is an openness and a clarity; Friends can look one another in the eye with an open face” . This of course would be the way that people could be friends. But in the lodge, there is a secretiveness, and hidden agenda that uses God’s name for self profit….be “it” “money”, “status”, “control” or what have you…but openness, NO WAY. People are so afraid to be real for fear that if they had a blemish on their person or personality that they are ungodly in some way. This is what the lodge teaches, this form of brainwashing, esp. if you are in leadership…there is no openness or clarity. If there was, then those in leadership would of exposed the beatings taken place in SLO. How could an elder, or a leading brother, which is also a shepherd of the flock , not take action when this was heard of? Even if he was told that it was taken care of. Is it too much work to call up the family and see if they are ok or if there is some way to help? If this was not done, no steps of reassurance that this was indeed taken care of were shown . Or could not any attempt have been made for reasons that you “love” the brethren? How could you ever call yourself a shepherd? Is that open or clear enough?
Friendships for the most part do not exist in the lodge. They are spoken of, played out, and even temporary, but they are not real. Friendships are not based on how much you can control the other person. They are not based on secrets. They are not based on what step of the ladder you sit on to George’s throne. They are not based on how committed you are to the “work” of George and his clones. Friendships are based on Trust, Love, Truth and Respect, with preferably God right in the center. But you won’t find that in the lodge for the most part. There is always a “CONDITION” to the love shown there. You are committed “IF” you go to all the meetings. You are loved “IF” you stay in this ministry. Totally a conditional love shown there. That is not what God calls love. But this is the love that is shown in the lodge – CONDITIONAL .

The Bible says “ Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends” John 15 :13

There is no “IF” in this statement. This is indeed what a friend does. A friend would lay down his life for another. It does not say anything about beating anyone up, or harassing and showing lack of respect. It does not say if you don’t do what we tell you to do or stay where we tell you to stay that we won’t love you anymore. The lodge has one twisted view of love and friendship etc……! It certainly is not God’s view. Friendship I would like to say does exist. Love does exist. Trust does exist. Truth does exist. Respect does exist. But it is blatently lacking there if it at all exists.