Very good question:

Because we are talking about the Assembly here, there are a few things to consider.

1.) There is no comprehensive policy regarding families per se, everything is by suggestion, couples' meetings, perspective of bro. so and so, etc.  Certain books are highly esteemed, The Perles, Fugate and others.
2.) It was taught explicitly by Betty Geftakys, and many of her adherents, that birth control is sin, because it violates the first command ever given to man by God, "be fruitful and multiply."
3.) This teaching has been blunted and softened by Tim Geftakys, who teaches that contraception and sterilization is OK for several reasons, one of which is financial.  Tim tends to be much more balanced in many of his views.  Nevertheless, the majority of "saints" have larger families than the average american.  I really can't say this is a bad thing, or a good thing, it is merely a fact. My wife and I have 5 children, and we don't regret it for a minute.  However, it is hard for some. I have also spoken to the children of several families who have 8 or 9 kids and these kids say that it is too many.
4.) Truly godly women don't work outside the home according to The Assembly. Again, this has softened a little bit over the years, but Ginger, Tim's wife, has worked outside the home since before 1983, which was when I got involved.  She was totally unique in this regard.  Many women gave up careers and have unused diploma's due to getting married in the Assembly.
5.) Childtraining was a major focus for years. This included mat training, no-fussing, teaching first time obedience, etc.  In the 80's and 90's the average Assembly kid got more than a dozen spankings a week, some much more.  Again, all I am telling you is my own first hand account.  This is totally accurate info.  I don't know if they have mellowed out on childtraining lately, but I wouldn't be surprised.  Over the years, some of the saints, even leaders, have had their kids taken away for a time by DSS.  Again, I am not saying that the kids should be taken away, I am only stating a fact.  One woman, who grew up in The Assembly, told me this recently:

 "When I think that there are 3 year old girls out there, being treated like that, I just can't stop crying."

This woman has vivid memories of angry parents and spankings before bed etc.  I think this is more the norm in the Assembly than the exception.  There are some exemplary parents in the Assembly as well, but they are few and far between.
6.) There is tremendous pressure to conform.  Very little, if anything was left to individual conscience, at least up until 2000, when I left.  If it wasn't dictated outright from the pulpit, it was dictated via "suggestions" in times of discipling.  Dress, hairlength, diet, manner of speech, and much more was quite regimented.  Again, these are my direct observations over 17 years. I visited from coast to coast and had my eyes wide open the whole time.

I don't think anyone would contradict what I have just said, and I know many out there could add a great deal to it.  I have decided not to go into detail about some of the childtraining techniques in my writing, because I don't want the authorities to use my words to remove the children from their homes.  I do not think that is right at all.

Interestingly, here in SLO several leader's and other families had their kids taken out of school and interogated by DSS about 2 years ago.  They took the opportunity to blame me for it, telling everyone I had accused them.  I did no such thing, and abhor the idea.

However, someone did report them for child abuse, and I hope they have toned it down.  The simple fact is that their kids are not happy. Everyone in town knows it, except the Assembly parents.

Be careful what you say about the kids. They are innocent and don't need any more trauma, especially from our government.  What they do need is God's Grace.

The saddest thing about the Assembly is that innocent people, like the kids, are damaged spiritually and emotionally.  There is physical abuse as well, but let's be fair, it doesn't just happen in the Assembly.  The tragedy is that if an abused kid from the "world," can find comfort in Christ, by getting involved in a church youth group, etc.  An Abused Assembly kid has no such resource in the Assembly.  They only get legalism, deception, and a pharisaic influence. Being a normal child is not allowed in the Assembly.  Oh, sure there are a few that seem OK, but history has shown, beyond any doubt that this group is not growing and thriving, and for good reason.

On a postive note, the Omaha based band Remedy, seems to me to be a bright spot. More on them later.

Brent

Here is some additional information in response to the question about contraception.  The irony is that when the assembly first began George and Betty promoted small families with only one or two children.  The idea was that your children would distract from serving God so you should keep that distraction to a minimum by limiting the number of children.  That has changed, however to what Brent was describing.  It also explains why older saints such as Tim and Ginger, and David and Judy, etc. have smaller families then the families started in the last 12 or so years.

Regarding abuse.  I have witnessed physical abuse first hand.  The tragedy is as a child you are told that not only is this way of being treated normal but godly, holy and spiritually superior.    

There is a hard decision.  Is a foster home better?  The abuses that occur in foster homes and in the Children’s Services make it difficult to justify them as a viable alternative.  Ultimately, the best scenario is that families get out of that place while their children are young and get help.  Better yet never get involved.

Ahhh....uh hmmmmm.....ehhh....err....

Kim? This is the place for your novel.  Unless you know of another?
I would love to hear more from you about this.

Brent

Hey Suzie Q--I'm with you all the way on this one!  For the benefit of those who don't know me (I have always been an "outsider" from a compromised church), I worked for Brent for a few years, along with another girl who was from the Assembly.  There were CONSTANTLY issues with her needing me to cover for her AT THE LAST MINUTE so she could take time off to "prepare for houseguests", including instances where I was very ill.  At first, I just figured she meant ordinary friends visiting, but as I learned more about the Assembly, I realized that it was in fact Mrs. Geftakys.  I guess I should say Betty to clarify.  I did think it was weird that she needed extra time just to get ready--just throw some clean sheets on the guest bed, right?  Now I realize the extent to which she lived her life in constant awareness and preparation for her "visits".  How sad that everyone's life had to be turned upside down for this woman (BG).    Worse yet was the fact that the sister mentioned had her own health problems, leading her to be extremely tired and fatigued quite often.  Yet she was still expected to be a servant.

For those lurkers who may be reading this who still feel that catering to "The Visitor" is a normal way of life: IT'S NOT.  My husband and I have houseguests frequently.  Most of them are gracious enough to forgive any overlooked housecleaning, to eat off of the dishes that we happen to have, eat whatever food we provide, and sometimes even voluntarily wash their own sheets and towels when they leave.  None of them expect us to take time off to so much as take them to the city (though we try to), let alone to wait on them hand and foot.  THIS IS THE NORMAL WAY OF DOING THINGS.  

I have made a LOT of observations like this from my onlooking perspective.  

Hi Everyone,
  Rachel, I talked with my 2 daughters, Deborah & Rebekah, and they remember you well and send you greetings.  You are quite right that GG and Betty encouraged small families at the beginning for exactly the reason you mentioned (kids get in the way of "The Work").
  My children have children now and because of their "Assembly child training" have difficulty in any kind of discipline.  When we left the Assembly I put a stop to spanking of any kind with our children.  I think it was hard on the kids to go from a very strict environment to one where they had liberty to choose a path for themselves.
   Assembly parents never really grow up as Christians, as they are never allowed to choose on their own to follow the Lord.  The same scenario is played out with the kids in their raising as with the parents in their Assembly "raising".
   Also, in the Assembly everyone takes a hand in the parenting of your children.  It is almost like Hillary Clinton's book, "It Takes A Village"; however in this case "It Takes A Assembly"!  This creates a herd mentality that punishes individual creative thought as rebellion, and rewards quiet compliance to the dictatorial Assembly rule.  Kim is quite right in observing the 2 different results of such child training: hypocrisy, or "rebellion" to the taskmasker view of God the Assembly posits.    God Bless,  Mark

This topic is probably one of the sadder aspects of the assemblies.  The teaching that was being given was to begin discipline at 4 months old.    Those who rejected the "teaching" were told:  "Well that's not the Assembly way.  At what time do you expect to get first-time obedience."  It's interesting that the leadership was excluded from the "fruit of the teaching".  The burden was placed on others to obtain first-time obedience but their own children were anything but obedient.

Eric

Greetings:
   I do hope that Karen Sanford will continue to share her observations. Her objectivity as an outsider ( outsider only in the sense of not having been an assembly member- and as a believer near and dear) who to a degree witnessed the "assembly way" is especially valuable in my estimation, at least.
   I would almost pay-but I have no money- to get more observations from Rachel S., S. Tr0ckman, KIMBERLEY Tobin, Ex-Assembly member(Guest), and others.
Yours,
Sebastian Andrew