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Author Topic: Driving into the Sunset, Part 2 - Health  (Read 26175 times)
mithrandir
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« on: October 10, 2003, 12:40:10 am »

In the assemblies, many of us were coerced into working to exhaustion to support the "ministry."  And I know many who had their health seriously damaged or ruined by the schedules we used to keep.  I have another question, therefore:

What effect has your leaving the assemblies had on your health?  What steps have you had to take to regain your health?  How has your schedule changed since you left?

mithrandir
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d3z
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« Reply #1 on: October 10, 2003, 12:54:47 am »

One thing I'm learning to do is to say "No, I'm sorry, I cannot do that."  It was very refreshing, the first time I said it at my new church, and the other person just said, "Oh, OK."  There was not pressure to do it anyway.

What's different.  Let's see:  I usually only go to church in the morning on Sunday.  Sometimes there is something in the afternoon or evening, but not usually.  I have more "free" evenings.  I actually do hobby things sometimes, and despite what T.G. says, it is a good thing.

I still have some committments.  I have to coordinate with the Deaf person who comes if I'm going to miss.  But, I just planned a vacation without talking to the LBs first.

I do have a lot less headaches now, too complicated to explain here, but basically I was doing way too much for my brain to handle.

Dave
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Eulaha L. Long
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« Reply #2 on: October 10, 2003, 02:00:08 am »

Clarence-

One of these days, I'd like to sit down and tell my story of my time living with the Zach's in Fullerton (for one month until I moved into the Geftakys').  What a nightmare that was...the emphasis?  "What happens when a relatively healthy young woman is put in charge of 6 kids and a large house".
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jloadams
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« Reply #3 on: October 14, 2003, 10:22:27 pm »

My health has improved dramatically...I don't get meetingitis at all anymore!  Sadly, my son still has serious complications from the case of "canneverpossiblyliveuptotheimpossiblestandardsowhyeventry" that he contracted while in the assembly.  It has caused him to be very leary of anything to do with God and with authority figures in general.  My husband (of one year, two weeks from today!) has been appreciative of some of the things I learned in assembly-like the fact that I had chosen to be celebate...even after leaving the assembly, until marriage, but he saw red flags all over the place almost everytime the assembly came up.  I was a huge defender of the "ministry" and couldn't really put my finger on why I had taken my son and left after 5 years.  The GA website and this BB have been like therapy for me.  This is the first time I've actually posted but I've been reading and working through issues and healing along with, I suspect, many other "lurkers".  We keep praying for my son and are actually going to a counselor!  Interesting sidebar...my husband and his kids mom divorced about 12 years ago.  He has worked very hard to maintain an amazing relationship with the kids.  All 4 of them, ages 11-21, love Jesus, love being involved in church and youth group and never get meetingitis.  They invite their friends to "church stuff" all the time and they actually come!  They have reached out to my son in a loving, winning way and while I think it may be a long road to recovery for him, I know God has seeds planted in his heart and someday he'll see the Jesus they know-the same Jesus so many of us from the assembly are finally getting to know!  The God of grace, the Great Physician, the One who makes us whole.
Janet  
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d3z
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« Reply #4 on: October 14, 2003, 10:41:21 pm »

I don't get meetingitis at all anymore!
At first, I wondered how being away from the assembly would keep you from having inflamation of the lining around the brain and spinal cord.  Tongue

It used to be, that on Saturdays, I would get this feeling of a dark cloud coming over me, knowing that the next day would be "all day for the Lord".  I remember, at times, actually hoping I would get sick.

Now, I actually look forward to going to church.  It is quite refreshing, really.
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vernecarty
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« Reply #5 on: October 15, 2003, 01:36:46 am »

 Sadly, my son still has serious complications from the case of "canneverpossiblyliveuptotheimpossiblestandardsowhyeventry" that he contracted while in the assembly.  It has caused him to be very leary of anything to do with God and with authority figures in general. Janet  

I don't know how old your son is but I would get him some of Max Lucado's literature for kids...
If he would let you, I would even read them to him!  Smiley
Verne
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jloadams
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« Reply #6 on: October 15, 2003, 07:34:46 am »

Thanks Verne...
My son is 17 now...unfortunately past the point of letting me read to him.  I am still open to any specific suggestions and welcome all prayers!
Janet
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vernecarty
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« Reply #7 on: October 15, 2003, 06:25:56 pm »

Thanks Verne...
My son is 17 now...unfortunately past the point of letting me read to him.  I am still open to any specific suggestions and welcome all prayers!
Janet

It is often true that the context of a child's religious experience with their parent makes it difficult for the parent to influence the child in spiritual matters. Many young adults who grew up in the assemblies have an understandable ambivalence vis a vis the judgment of their parents on spiritual issues. This is unfortunate as many of these parents are much the wiser because of the experince. One possible way to pray for your seventeen year old is that God would bring into his life someone, perhaps and older brother in Christ who would have a better chance to model and teach those qualities that makes Christ so precious to us. God bless you and yours Janet.
Verne
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jackhutchinson
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« Reply #8 on: October 16, 2003, 03:17:57 am »

Yep,

That 'can-never-possibly-live-up-to-the-impossible-standard-so-why-even-try' virus was pretty common in SLO.  I had it all year round.  I'm still dealing with the feelings of guilt for not trying to meet some kind of standard (like meetings, Bible study, etc).  I know this will pass and I will be able to do these things with increased capacity.

Jack
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Joe Sperling
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« Reply #9 on: October 16, 2003, 03:31:37 am »

Jack---

Where were you Monday? We missed you at the meeting....you weren't watching football or something worldly like that were you?  You know commitment is important. What's really important to you Jack? Look.... other churches may meet on Sunday and Wednesday, but were not about that here. You need to set your priorities my friend.....

 Cheesy
« Last Edit: October 16, 2003, 03:33:56 am by Joe Sperling » Logged
jackhutchinson
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« Reply #10 on: October 16, 2003, 04:23:39 am »

Joe,

I was playing hooky so I wouldn't have to go to the meeting (just like I did when I was a kid).  Only now instead of watching cartoons I watch 'Everybody Loves Raymond' on Monday evenings.

We taught that we should not have 'spritual' parts of our lives and then 'secular' parts of our lives.  So far, so good.  But, while others made a distinction between the 'spiritual' and the 'secular', we just used different terms - 'the work' and 'worldliness'.  Any activity that did not benefit the ministry (outreach, meetings, anchor groups, etc) was considered worldly or at best a necessary evil to be quickly handled so we could get back to what was really important - THE MINISTRY.  This was nothing more than a repackaged form of aestheticism.

Jack
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Joe Sperling
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« Reply #11 on: October 16, 2003, 04:42:27 am »

I'm just curious---I was in the Assembly a long time ago---circa 1974-1980.  When I first began attending,
the worship had moments of sitting and standing. A couple of years before I left, we stood through the whole worship time. It got so you felt guilty or less holy if you got tired and had to sit down.  After 1980 did it progress any further?? I mean, did it get to the point where people were running in place the whole time?


--Joe

 Grin just kidding of course.
« Last Edit: October 16, 2003, 05:12:48 am by Joe Sperling » Logged
Oscar
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« Reply #12 on: October 16, 2003, 05:55:02 am »

I'm just curious---I was in the Assembly a long time ago---circa 1974-1980.  When I first began attending,
the worship had moments of sitting and standing. A couple of years before I left, we stood through the whole worship time. It got so you felt guilty or less holy if you got tired and had to sit down.  After 1980 did it progress any further?? I mean, did it get to the point where people were running in place the whole time?


--Joe

 Grin just kidding of course.

 GG went to Greece and saw that the people in the Greek Orthodox services stood up through the whole service.  This might have had something to do with the fact that their churches don't have any chairs, but GG saw it as a new legalistic standard to strive for.  This is called "the liberty of the Holy Spirit"  If you didn't see it that way, you were just carnal.

Well, no one wants to hang out an "I am carnal" sign...so like sheep we all stood up.

Now, running in place...don't you wish GG had visited a christian gym or something and had been inspired by the idea of being a "heavenly footman" 24/7.  

Isn't legalism fun???

Thomas Maddux
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Oscar
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« Reply #13 on: October 16, 2003, 06:02:23 am »

In the assemblies, many of us were coerced into working to exhaustion to support the "ministry."  And I know many who had their health seriously damaged or ruined by the schedules we used to keep.  I have another question, therefore:

What effect has your leaving the assemblies had on your health?  What steps have you had to take to regain your health?  How has your schedule changed since you left?

mithrandir

Dear Mith,

I suffered for years with hypoglycemia brought on by adrenal exhaustion which was a result of stress.  It was like a little piece of hell.  I tried every remedy known to man except common sense.  I went to chiropracters, nutritionists, a chinese herbalist, (that ground up goat horn powder makes a real tasty drink...if you are a goat), medical doctors...whatever.  I even let some MD inject me with pig adrenalin at about $40 a whack.     Nothing helped.  

About 10 days after I left the assembly...it went away.

I have been fine for years now.  Rarely a problem and then very mild.  Just a few times a year when I am stressed.  

Now if I could only conquer this urge to eat garbage and roll in mud.

Thomas Maddux
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Eulaha L. Long
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« Reply #14 on: October 18, 2003, 12:10:31 am »

I have finished my short essay about my experience in the Zach household.  Send me a personal meesage if you'd like a copy of it.
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