..."for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which
I have committed unto Him against that day". (2tim.1:12)
I know in my head He has not moved but my heart has trouble finding Him these days. If you pray, remember me. When you get a promise, share it...please.
This is not to liven things up or be just one more voice. I'm new, this is my hello.
Thanks. (micah6:6-8)
Hi Norm!
And, thanks for your honest and sincere post. I'd like to say first that I will be praying for you and I'd like to share with you this promise:
"Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven." MT. 5:3. I'm used to reading this verse and only recently read it again, and thought how strange this phrase is. What does it mean to be poor in spirit? So I went ahead and tried to figure it out.
W. E. Vine translates the use of the word "spirit" here as meaning:"the sentient element in man, that by which he perceives, reflects, feels, desires." ("sentient" means to experience sensation and feeling, as well as consciousness).
This verse, and W.E. Vine's translation seem to go right to your problem between your solid thinking vs. your troubled heart that "can't find Him." I know exactly what you mean and I'll bet many Christians share the same feeling of inadequacy.
So, "poor in spirit" kind of describes where you're at, because you feel a lack in your soul, and yet know in your mind that God has promised you eternal security in his love and new lilfe in His Spirit !
What's with all this inner poverty, mourning, meekness, and hunger and thirst over my lack of righteousness that Jesus describes here? Why is this so blessed?
I'm trying to think of a common sense answer here, one that makes sense to the heart that feels far from God, as well as the mind:
One's faith must control how we feel about God, the world, ourselves. Often former Assembly members start with how they feel, which if they're honest leaves them feeling that they are "poor in spirit." This is a very bad habit to get into (I know as I still struggle with this) and not a healthy way to live one's life. (I've gone into how the Assembly cultivated their version of "heart knowledge of God" in the past, and why this is a dangerous practice, but will skip it here.)
The truth is, if you feel as if God is far away (poor in spirit) you are in a good place-- at least according to Jesus--- as long as you know in your mind that " I am persuaded that he is able, etc."
The false notion that God's Spirit is supposed to flood our emotional lives with feelings of God's nearness, affection, assurance, etc., instantly when we feel the need within is not correct. When one adds to the above false notion the idea that if only I can believe, try, correctly choose, crucify self, etc. strong enough I can earn God's presence in my life then we set ourselves up for a real toxic religious experience.
Life will then be an up and down ride on the large ocean waves of my inner life.
GG didn't invent Galatianism, but that system was operable in the Assembly. As such, it took good Christian people and exchanged their liberty for the bondage of a merit system. Just as those that deceived the Galatians used the bible and their Christian status GG twisted these good things to set us on the wrong path to not knowing God's best for our lives. (okay, so I didn't "skip it this time."
)
The Bible does say we are to have strong "hearts" as well as "minds", and there defintlely is a distinction between these words, but without the mind leading by faith trying to find God through my heart alone (feelings) will be a dark journey ( I can vouch for this personally).
Just as GG turned God's blessing into a curse we can now turn that curse into a blessing; notice how in the above verses in Matt. 5 those "blessed" who start out poor end up being "merciful" ( those that are sensitive and forgiving to the moral weakness of others), vs. the harsh style of phariseeism that GG and his cronies practiced.
The end of faith is not to feel God's presence and power but the expression of God's love to others. Pray for me that I might experience much more of this kind of "spirit" in my own life!
God Bless, Mark C.