I remember that day 15 years ago when my sister dropped her application off at
See's Candy. She got the job and has worked there ever since. My dear sister,
so energetic, so youthful, so athletic---but now, 15 years later, she weighs 478
LBS, and always smells like chocolate. In fact, that's all she ever talks about, with
that smile encrusted with a dark chocolate moustache. She never intends to leave,
because she is so addicted to candy that the very smell of it causes her to foam at
the mouth.
And, all around her, are other employees who fell in like manner. Like Manny, who used
to be a weight-lifter, and now has been reduced to a rotund tub of lard, and who is
one of those people who samples the chocolates in the box, putting the ones he doesn't
like back in, even though there's a bite mark in it. And we can all thank See's Candies for
these atrocities. See's, I want my sister back <choke>, you destroyer's of fitness and
well-being. I hold you accountable See's Candies---you will all pay one day.
The above was brought to you by "Whitman's Chocolates" known for their famous 4 piece
sampler.
